My year without alcohol special offer: I'll match donations up to £1,000!!!

As my BILLIONS of regular followers will no doubt already be aware, on 9th November 2015 I commenced My Year Without Alcohol, vowing not to touch a drop of booze for one calendar year (which included 29th February - natch). Not that I'm counting the nanoseconds, but there are now just 21 days left.

I won't pretend this last year's been easy. Among other things, we moved house (again), I had a hernia (not recommended), both of our beloved cats died (RIP Katie and Marula), and we went camping in France, where the rivers all run claret - and I had to drink Diet Coke. It's enough to drive a man to drink.

I decided to have a "dry" year for a number of reasons: for a newspaper article (more details soon), for my health, my wallet, and to prove I could do it after 35 years of fairly remorseless imbibing. I do feel much better - rested, healthy, and I've finally completed two books I'd been arsing around with for way too long.

However, I also took the #PiggottPledge for Children in Need, hoping a few of you might sponsor my "dryathlon" (not to be confused with the admirable though frankly wimpish Dry September on behalf of Cancer Research UK). And, well... donations thus far have been - shall we say - "disappointing."

Therefore I'm making a generous, neigh, rash offer: because I've saved about £1,000 on booze, I'll match all donations to Children in Need till the total reaches £1,000. That would make £2,000 in total. If the total goes higher, I won't be able to match it but you'll have my undying affection. Or something.

You don't have to donate ONE PENNY till the year's up (FFS hurry up 9th November...) Just make a pledge on my Facebook page and who knows, it might even encourage others to do likewise. This offer remains open till 9th November 2017. So what you waiting for, peeps - blood?

Oh. Right. Well - at least it's alcohol-free. For now, anyway.